marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize