Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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