Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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