You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
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I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
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You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!