Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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