I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Randomize
