"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
