You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
