And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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