My vagina just recognized that song.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
