Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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