Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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