I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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