i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize