She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I wear drunk well.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
