I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Of course I have a pirate flag
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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