i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
