tell your sister to shave her snatch
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
