I just cut my nipple shaving
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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