508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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