i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
