and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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