Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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