His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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