I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
