tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize