CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
