help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
