But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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