her vagine was all disorganized.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My pussy is not your playground.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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