so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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