on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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