i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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