i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
What changed your mind?
Being sober
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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