Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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