I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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