I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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