she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
