I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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