he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
