i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
