A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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