? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Randomize
