I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Randomize
