Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
