Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
We talked him into tasing himself.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
