Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
