We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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