if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
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