I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
